So, are your parents still living?
Forums:
Saw a lot of folks on the social media, posting about how much they miss their fathers now that they're gone.
My mom is 82, healthy, very active busy person. My (estranged) father & my stepfather both died in the last few years.
On the other hand my daughter's dad passed when she was only 18. Lung cancer - apparently related to 9/11. His survivors got financial a settlement because he died from 9/11 so I guess it must be the reason. Fortunately, I'm still here. Getting pretty old, though.
Obviously a lot of people lose their parents at a young age. While other people's parents live to see their great-great grandchildren, and so on. I was just wondering about y'all here at the viva, if you care to comment. One thing for sure,
Death don't have NO mercy
in this land.
None at all, not even one little bit.
[btw does anyone else love how they had that smokin DDHNM playing at the beginning of LST... I also thought the images they used were perfectly chosen and perfectly synchronized w/the sound. It's one of my favorite parts of the movie.]
- Log in to post comments
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: comic book colors on a violin river...
Lost my Dad and younger sis 3
Lost my Dad and younger sis 3 yrs ago within 3 months of each other. I was in CT then and my 85yr old Mom was thrown into a dark, deep tailspin of many health and emotional issues. Never thought I would be the one to do this , but we bought a second home here in Jersey and I now care for her FT. I was always the one to "go away" and tried to get get out of Jersey...:(
I have learned you do what you gotta do, one foot in front of the other, everyone has their hurdles and some much, much higher than mine... fer sure !
Worse part is that NO one comes to visit her or helps, it is sad that she gave all her life and they have all forgotten about her. She and I are two very, very different women, yet on some days we are more alike than I could ever imagine :)
I just don't see myself living too long, and that is ok as this is my final mission and I try to dance thru every day...the best I can ~
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: long live the dead
Strong women up there much
Strong women up there much love your way
and hell yes the 1 foot in front of the other
sometimes hurdles can look high and sometimes they can look small
approach and perspective has a lot to do with it
Mom's been gone 23 years
And Peggy was a wild one 2nd° dead head and Jerry fan but Billie holiday Was her muse. she could make a woman cry
Dad is still blessed to be living in his home in Palo Alto and into months will be 101
He kind of didn't understand it was Father's Day today and isn't too motivated to get out of bed much it seems like he's declining about 5% a month now but he has indeed had a long strange trip and all his children were visiting over the last week and he knows he surrounded by love
I suspect his time is not far off but one never knows but I'm pretty sure he has no regrets or in fact expectations
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: Sycamore Slough
Nice thread Ms. BrightDay...
Nice thread Ms. BrightDay...
Mom passed back in 1999, and her Mom in 1983.
The Grandma passing was less of a shock to me because, well Grandmas are old. Grandma was around 83 when She passed on.
Mom was a bit young in my opinion, at age 73, but Mr. Death just does his job.
Dad passed on a few years back, eighty-something. He had a Good Life
Just the other Day I saw an old Photograph of Dad holding a Puppy back when. Could have been any of the Childhood Dogs? Was it Arno I or Arno II ??
The Arnos were loyal German Shepherds and bred Sabrina & Kahlua.
Nobody would mess with those Dogs and walk away. They were absolute killers, but protective of us kids.
So that is what my Mom & Dad taught me.
However, I now have a Hüsky, which is a terrible Watchdog, But he is very friendly to all age-groups.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: treat island
My mom is 93, dad is 94. They
My mom is 93, dad is 94. They're struggling.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: Rob W
My mom died last summer a
My mom died last summer a month shy of 76 - COPD finally caught up with her 7 years after diagnosis. Mother's Day and my recent 50th birthday were a bit melancholy to say the least. My sister, brother, and I have been looking after our dad since then. He just turned 86 and has been in an awful state of deteriorating health for around 3 years. He has no desire to be here, wakes up every day bummed that he still is, almost never leaves the house, and has about no quality of life. I developed a nasty cold over the weekend so was only able to talk to him on the phone for about 30 seconds for Father's Day. Watching him suffer has been difficult.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: FlutterBy
Im basically an orphan.
Im basically an orphan.
I miss my father
If it is a plus side, the matriarchal branch of my fam has a long lifespan. I didn't much care until Alex came into my life. Now, all i want is 50 good years together...
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: FlutterBy
((((Rob)))))
((((Rob)))))
It's tough, when you lose a BeLoved parent, then must go on thru holidays, anniversaries, etc. Huge hugs to you!
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: Ausonius
Mom died almost 8 years ago.
Mom died almost 8 years ago.
Dad is 91 and for the past two years has been deteriorating mentally. He fell and broke a hip just before his 89th birthday and has never completely recovered his mental faculties after the hip replacement operation. He went from being completely independent to completely dependent overnight and it's been a really tough adjustment for him. Top of his class chemical engineer to a guy who can't figure out a TV remote control. He's in a top flight assisted care living situation but it's depressing for him and it's painful to watch him slip away. The only plus is that we are closer than ever before and that's worth a lot. Went to see him yesterday, took my daughter up and that always makes him smile.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: magoo
Lost both parents, 6 months
Lost both parents, 6 months apart, 12 years ago. Still gets to me at times. All I can say if your parents are alive, visit frequently and be there for them. One day you will be very grateful you did. Someone said to me after they passed "your supposed to bury your Mother & Father" it hurt at the time, but understand today.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: Painted Mandolin
My mom left us in 2002 from
My mom left us in 2002 from Ovarian Cancer at the age of 68.
My Dad succumbed to Lewy-Body Dementia (a form of Parkinson's Disease) at 83 back in 2010.
It sucks to have no parents around....
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: .............
Lost my Dad right before i
Lost my Dad right before i turned 18, after he battled cancer for 6 years...feel like i got cheated...my mom basically checked into a bottle after that, she was a mess...finally got her shit together, then got sick, and we lost her a cpl years before my son was born....so, say 25 years ago....
Its really weird, but i get a strange feeling when i meet ppl my age who still have both their parents...let alone one...give them a hug every day...
Saturday night i had a strange, short snippet, of a dream. My dad appeared clear as day. This is sooo rare. I can count the times that has happened on one hand. And i consider it a gift. It wasnt until half way thru yesterday that i remembered dream, and realized the connection to day etc...
Thoughts and prayers go out to all who are caretakers for their elderly parents...and a cpl extra sent your way, Rob.
Love to all....
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: Bluelight
My Mom passed away in May of
My Mom passed away in May of 2015 (that I deeply miss), & I'm taking care of my father who is loosing his marbles.
It's been tuff. I do it all.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: James Botluk
My dad died suddenly at age
My dad died suddenly at age 70 twenty years ago. My mom, Grandma Jimp, died last September at 88. Until about a year before she died, we were going to see Robert Hunter, Josh Ritter, Hot Tuna, Del & Dawg, etc. I miss them both very much.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: Is forgiveness possible?
My Dad passed in 1990 and my
My Dad passed in 1990 and my Mom in 1997. I have been an orphan for 20 years now.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: skyjunk
They're dead and being the
They're dead and being the oldest child means I'm probably next
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: DNB - Best band & fans in the land!
Dad is 91, Mom is 87... their
Dad is 91, Mom is 87... their 67th wedding anniversary is in September
amazingly, they both have good mental faculties, esp. my mom who remembers way more than I do and I'm 23 years younger than her
but, their mobility is an issue, as my dad just barely shuffles along and often uses a walker, and mom has such bad arthritis that she can't be on her feet any longer than about 10 minutes before she has to sit down or lie down
in a few days I'll be flying back east to visit, it's my annual June-July "vacay" to see family and friends from Syracuse to Albany and points north... I'll be there a full 4 weeks this year
my 2 brothers and I will be moving the folks into an independent living facility -- FINALLY -- and going through stuff at their split-level home with stairs everywhere, in preparation for selling the house at some future date... not exactly my idea of a relaxing "vacation" but we knew this time was coming
I love my parents dearly and cherish the times we spend together... just so thankful that dementia has not entered the picture like it so commonly does with aging parents
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: Backroads Bill
Dad will be 91 next month,mom
Dad will be 91 next month,mom is 92.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: Strangha
Lost my mom in April of 2015.
Lost my mom in April of 2015. Family came together wonderfully, in love, living mom's example. Four of five children around the bed when she passed
We always thought dad would go first.
I got to spend the day with my dad on his birthday, his last day on earth, this past March, holding his hand in a care facility.
I got 15 seconds of open eyes in the afternoon. Arrived at 10 AM, I left about 7:15 PM, he died at 3 in the morning. 94 years and one day old.
He held on for me. What a gift. Thanks dad.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: cb
My dad passed in 2013 at 92.
My dad passed in 2013 at 92.
Mom passed in 2014 at 84 after a very long battle with Alzheimer's.
I think of them often. Sometimes they visit me in my dreams.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: Scott Schaffer
Lost both my parents within 2
Lost both my parents within 2 year of each other. Mom from Uterine cancer, Dad from COPD related issues.
Sucks
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: _
Yes, they are both still
Yes, they are both still alive and healthy. I'm glad my children get to spend so much time with all four of their grandparents.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: FlutterBy
cb, love it.
cb, love it.
((6))
it's odd that it never occurred to me after my mother died, being parentless. because my father meant everything to me. but my mother was such an everpresent and looming figure in my life, that, once she was gone, I have felt free of her. thankfully!!
anyhoo, love to anyone missing a parent, or, both ):
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: FlutterBy
((((Scott))))
((((Scott))))
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: treat island
I've been with my parents for
I've been with my parents for the last 10 days and will leave dementialand today. There is so much more to them and their story... This year will be their 72nd wedding anniversary but they are now living apart and mom is heartbroken while being confused a lot of the time, and having quite restricted mobility.
Reminder, there is a thread for caregivers, support, questions, etc. in the Caregivers folder. It's been very helpful over the years. Sort of like the Hep C folder, there's love and respect there.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: Lasher Von Zekenstein
Dad's been gone 12 years now.
Dad's been gone 12 years now. Mom is staring at 90, but not living much of a life. In a nursing home, in a ward with other dementia patients. She's not one of the one's who are worse off - many of her wardmates at further gone than she, which confuses and agitates her. It's a tough place to visit every week - feels like something out of One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest, but it is what Medicaid will pay for. She knows who I am, and that I have a wife and daughter, but couldn't pick out her daughter-in-law (who she's known for 28+ years) or her granddaughter out of a line up.
Are you glad you asked?
(wow - re-reading this, I sound bitter as hell. Just tired, worn out, more than anything. The last 20 years have been tough on this front.) Sorry, Dar.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: Sound and Vision
Yes, love them dearly.
Yes, love them dearly.
Spending a lot of time with my father lately. He made arrangements to have my grandma and grandpa's cremains buried this Friday- they've been gone a couple of years. Through this whole process he has made a decision about his cremains. It's been nice to spend time together and a little trying too (he has a huge heart deep down just a rough shell(?). We joked he could have yelled at those he loved or yelled a lot engraved on his tombstone. My mother, on the other hand, rarely raises her voice and is patient for the most part. She also has arrangements made. Love them both so much it's hard to think about either one of them not being around (they're divorced and still on good terms). One of his best friends just passed away so we went to the wake and funeral. Weird because we were with Dennis the day before he had a heart attack and wasn't feeling well.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: _________
Lost MoM in Aug 2007
Lost MoM in Aug 2007
DaD 15 Months Later in November 2008
They ARE Missed ! and Loved By Tons of US.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: Oaksterdam Dan
Moms is 72 Dad is 71 and I'm
Moms is 72 Dad is 71 and I'm lucky to still have them.
I'm the only single son. Both older brothers are married with children. So I guess I'm my parents caregiver in the future.
Much Love to you all.