Excerpts of press releases for albums you'll never listen to

Example:

"Drawing from J.D. Salinger, the Song of Solomon and Greek mythology, singer-songwriter Neil Holyoak tells of silver street performers, long walks with vampire buddies, and talking flowers that grow old in a day. Producer Howard Bilerman faithfully captures this hallucinogenic narrative through the soft focus of his 2″ tape machine."

Jesus, man.