RIP Bartholomew Richard Fitzgerald-Smythe
Forums:
AKA Mr. Peanut.....
Mr. Peanut had to die, if only to be born again
Planters has killed off the beloved branding device, or rather the anthropomorphic legume has “sacrificed himself” in a humanlike act of selflessness. The tragedy occurred in a 30-second pre-Super-Bowl spot that features Mr. Peanut and his friends (Matt Walsh and Wesley Snipes, for some reason) swerving off a cliff to avoid hitting an armadillo with their Nutmobile (exactly what it sounds like).
We’re devastated to confirm that Mr. Peanut is gone. He died doing what he did best – having people’s backs when they needed him most. #RIPeanut pic.twitter.com/TLNPLzH5UE
— The Estate of Mr. Peanut (@MrPeanut) January 22, 2020
The unexpected demise of Mr. Peanut is a marketing gimmick, of course, and boy, does it work. The very existence of this column is a sign of complete surrender to the corporate geniuses who dispatched, at the age of 104, a mascot who was basically a protein-packed brother to Mr. Monopoly.
Whose next? Tony the Tiger? The Green Giant? The Frito Bandito? The California Raisons?
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Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: Bucky Badger
Thom the cunt?
Thom the cunt?
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: Ausonius
Keeping it classy, as always.
Keeping it classy, as always.
You really are the perfect representative of the contemporary progressive left. Rude, ignorant, and obnoxious.
Congratulations.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: Philzone Refugee
It was the salmon mousse.
It was the salmon mousse.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: spectrums of cage free range
Investigators Probe Clinton Connection in Death of Mr. Peanut
Source: Clinton Raged Over Mr. Peanut's Refusal to Provide Free Snacks at 2016 Campaign Events.
Law enforcement officials have reportedly questioned former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton in connection to a federal probe into the death of Mr. Peanut.
https://www.wibc.com/blogs/chicks-right/investigators-probe-clinton-conn...
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: Rasputin O'Leary
Damn Clintons, they were
Damn Clintons, they were always jealous of Jimmy Carter
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: Def. High
Actual cause of death: peanut
Actual cause of death: peanut allergy.